Friday, March 17, 2017

Morale boost for the lovelorn; Canonization fodder; Catching some ZZZ’s, throwing some LED’s; R.I.M.E. in the U.S.A.


P! SLICES: OVER (65 + 432) SERVED

Welcome to our March 17th edition of Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! This Sunday, March 19th, is the Feast of St. Joseph…

What about St. Patrick, you say? Yeah, sure, I guess his feast day is today, March 17. But who cares? Let’s face it, all the Patmeister really did was to drive a mess o’ serpents outta Ireland, and to drive up the price of shamrocks on the commodities market. (Sorry Patrick J. Berry!)

So, what’s so hot about St. Joseph, you may ask? Well, he was only the father of God! – okay, okay, step-father, but still...

So do an Irish jig off of that boozy green St. Paddy Wagon and hop aboard (7:49) our bluesy clean St. Joe bandwagon!

Speaking of the saintly, our Appetizer this week consists of limericks in which you must fill in the blanks to complete some of the rhymes. I composed these limericks 24 years ago; maybe you can improve them by filling in the blanks with words different from what I used!

Besides that Appetizer, we offer nine other puzzles this week, including 7 Will Shortz Rip/Riff-offs.

Please enjoy… but please also go easy on the green beer!
 

Hors d’Oeuvre Menu

Happily Ever After Hors d’Oeuvre:
Morale boost for the lovelorn

A bachelorette and bachelor, both lovelorn for too long, meet at a singles bar, go on dates, fall in love, and marry. He gets a job driving a taxi; she stays at home as the housekeeper. He makes no sales, gets canned and cannot find other work. Their house becomes a pigsty; the food is inedible. They bicker and battle.
They go to a marriage counselor who suggests he be the housekeeper and she begin bringing home the bacon and bread. They heed the advice. She gets hired driving a bakery delivery truck. It turns out that he is a neat freak, one who goes online and learns to become a gourmet cook. They live happily ever after.

The moral to this fable – which is also the key to its happy fairytale ending – can be summed up in two or three words – or  actually, in a two-word phrase or a three-word phrase, both which express the same idea with very similar wording.

To discover the two-word phrase, find four consecutive letters that appear in each of three different words in the fable, then give a description of those four letters.
To discover the three-word phrase, find five consecutive letters that appear in one word in the fable, then give a description of those five letters.

What is the moral of the fable? What are the four words in which you can find a somewhat disguised description of the moral?

Appetizer Menu

In March Saints March In Appetizer:
Canonization fodder

To rejuvenate hearts (9 letters)
And save souls were two goals of St. (7),
   Plus, with all of his might or
   His shamrock or (5),
To rock shams (that makes three), what a (3,5)!

Foster father of Jesus, St. (6),
Just a man but a just man. Who (5,2)
   This good worker with (4)
   Would have wished for (9)?
He’s not one of those boasters who (5,3).


Marching in go the saints all this (5)
From March 1st through to March 31th.
   Were we all, Lord, so numbered –
   Holy souls (12)
By holes – we’d with love overrunneth!

Fill in the blanks in the limericks above to complete the rhymes. 
(The numbers in parentheses at the end of the lines indicate how many letters the words contain.)

MENU 

Ripping Off Shortz And Collins Slices:

Will Shortz’s March 12th NPR Weekend Edition Sunday puzzle, composed by Peter Collins, reads:
Name a well-known city in the U.S. Two words. The second word rhymes with a word meaning certain stories — and the first word rhymes with something found in those stories. What city is it?
Puzzleria’s Riffing/Ripping Off Shortz and Collins Slices read:

ONE:
Name a well-known city in the southern U.S. Two words. Write a caption for the image of the feline Olympian (at the right, above) using three one-syllable words – noun, preposition, noun, in that order. The caption’s first two words form a rhyme for the city’s first word. The caption’s third word rhymes with the city’s second word.
What city is it? What is the caption?

TWO:
Name a well-known U.S. artist. Just the last name, two syllables. The first syllable rhymes with a word meaning a “certain story” — and the second syllable rhymes with something found in that story. What artist is it?

THREE:
Name a city in the western U.S. Two 2-syllable words. The first word and the first syllable of the second word rhyme with dances, both which highlight hip movement. What city is it? What dances are these?
FOUR:
Name a city in the western U.S. Two words. The second word rhymes with the name of a poet, one word — and the first word rhymes with a subject depicted in his poetry.
What city is it? Who is the poet and the subject?

FIVE:
Name a city in the western U.S. Two words, each which rhymes with the first name of a fictional character. The first is the title character of a novel/movie/musical that begins with a Z. The second is a character of a novel/movie/musical that ends with a z.
What city is it? Who are these characters?

SIX:
Name a well-known but very small town in the eastern U.S. Two words. Each word rhymes with a collective term for creatures – the first used with quail, doves, swans and otters; the second used with ducks or bucks.
What small town is it? What are the collective terms?

SEVEN:
Remove the first letter from a 4-letter Apple product, resulting in a collective term for a marine mammal. Name a 6-letter Amazon tech product that is a collective term for a young feline mammal that appears in the lyrics of a Johnny Mathis hit song.
Now name a well-known city in the southern U.S. Two words. The first word rhymes with the marine mammal — and the second word rhymes with the title of the hit song.
What city is it? What are the hit song title, the two mammals and the Apple and Amazon products?

Dessert Menu

Digital Alarm Dessert
Catching some ZZZ’s, throwing some LED’s

At 8:08 in the evening, just before hitting the hay, Bob sets his battery-powered LED digital alarm clock for 8:08 in the morning.
Alas during the wee hours, when Bob is in the middle of catching some dreamy REM ZZZ’s, his clock malfunctions, buzzing much earlier than he had set it for. Groggily, Bob grabs it from his bed’s headboard and pegs (like a right fielder trying to throw out a tagging runner at home) the still-buzzing clock across the dark room. What developed immediately after he did this?

Well, let’s put it this way. If Ted Williams – or anyone with similar superior eyesight – were in the bedroom at that moment, he or she would be able to read two alternating LED images on the clock display as it hurtles spinningly wallward.

The first alternating image (if you ignore the colon between the hours and minutes on the display) is a word describing what this particular digital clock at this instant  as well as what it measures (proverbially)  both do. This word rhymes (but has no letter in common) with a synonymous second word describing what this particular digital clock at this instant  as well as what it measures (proverbially)  both do.

The second alternating image (if you ignore half of the colon on the display) is an approximation of a number that rhymes with the word in the first image and which, when spelled out, also shares no letter in common with the synonymous second word.
The clock hits the wall with a crinkling clinking plastic clashing crash – a timepiece in pieces. The buzzing ceases. The room goes utterly dark and silent. Bob goes back to sleep.

At exactly what time did the alarm go off? What are the three rhyming words?

Every Friday at Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! we publish a new menu of fresh word puzzles, number puzzles, logic puzzles, puzzles of all varieties and flavors. We cater to cravers of scrumptious puzzles!

Our master chef, Grecian gourmet puzzle-creator Lego Lambda, blends and bakes up mysterious (and sometimes questionable) toppings and spices (such as alphabet soup, Mobius bacon strips, diced snake eyes, cubed radishes, “hominym” grits, anagraham crackers, rhyme thyme and sage sprinklings.)

Please post your comments below. Feel free also to post clever and subtle hints that do not give the puzzle answers away. Please wait until after 3 p.m. Eastern Time on Wednesdays to post your answers and explain your hints about the puzzles. We serve up at least one fresh puzzle every Friday.


We invite you to make it a habit to “Meet at Joe’s!” If you enjoy our weekly puzzle party, please tell your friends about Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! Thank you.

Friday, March 10, 2017

In wine there are lees but no lies; Spoonerfuls of the soupernatural; News streaming; Rightside-left, downside-up, leftside-right, upside-down

P! SLICES: OVER (65 + 432) SERVED

Welcome to our March 10th edition Joseph Young’s Puzzleria!

We offer up seven puzzles this week, including 4 Will Shortz Rip/Riff-offs (actually 5, because one of them is a twofer).

Please enjoy.
 
Hors d’Oeuvre Menu

Pouring Out An Hors d’Oeuvre:
News streaming

Take a two-syllable seven-letter compound word that has been in the news this past week. Reverse the syllables and add a space between them, forming two words.

Reverse the last two letters in the second word. Replace a personal pronoun in the second word with a preposition represented by a symbol on a standard typewriter or keyboard.
 
The result is an alternative to Evian, Dasani, Aquafina, Perrier or Poland Spring.
What is the alternative? What is the word in the news?
Hint: Replace the middle letter in the first of the two words with an alcoholic beverage to form the surname of a teetotaling person associated with the recent news story.


Appetizer Menu

Spoonerfuls of the soupernatural

Name a long-running cable television show. Remove its first and final words, both consisting of one syllable.

Spell out what remains and spoonerize those two words (that is, reverse their initial sounds) to form a hyphenated two-word phrase that sounds like a description of the supernatural standing of a certain audience the show targets.

What is the TV show? What is the supernatural standing of the target audience?



MENU 

Ripping Off Shortz Slices:
Rightside-left, downside-up, leftside-right, upside-down

Will Shortz’s February 26th NPR Weekend Edition Sunday puzzle reads:
Write the name of a game in small letters. Reverse the second and third letters. Turn the fourth letter upside-down. The result will name something else to play. What is it?

Puzzleria’s Riffing/Ripping Off Shortz Slices read:

ONE:
Name something that plays very briefly on screens before a movie begins. Write it backward in small letters. Rotate the new second letter 180 degrees along the axis perpendicular to the surface on which it is written. The result will name something else to play.
What is this something else that is played? What plays very briefly on movie screens?

TWO:
A.
Write the name of a small bird in small letters. Rotate each of its first two letters 180 degrees along the axis perpendicular to the surface on which each written. The result will name the first step in replacing the ragged roof of a tiki hut.
What is this first step? What is the bird?

B.
Write the name of an adjective that can precede “family” or “winter,” in small letters. Rotate each of its first two letters 180 degrees along the axis perpendicular to the surface on which each written. The result will name an adjective describing what the pronunciation of the first adjective is to many people, including even former presidents.
What is these two adjectives?

THREE:
Write two 3-letter synonyms for “nothing” and place them next to each other without a space. Capitalize the initial letter but keep the others small. Rotate the third letter 180 degrees along its vertical axis (in other words, create its mirror image), and capitalize the result. Rotate the fourth letter 180 degrees along the axis perpendicular to the surface on which it is written. Rotate the first letter 90 degrees along the axis perpendicular to the surface on which it is written. If you pronounce the result aloud you will name a brand-name cold and flu relief product.

What is this product? What are the two synonyms for “nothing”?

FOUR:
Write, in small letters, the name of a soft gray sulfide mineral used in matchmaking and cosmetics. Spell the first three letters backward and insert an apostrophe to form a contraction. 

Rotate the first letter and the second letter of the remaining five letters 180 degrees along the axis perpendicular to the surface on which each was written. This result, along with the contraction preceding it, is often followed by a modifier such as “simple,” “interesting” or “alright”... For example:


“_ _’ _   _ _ _ _ _  simple…” is a part of quotations spoken by Thomas Watson Jr., or by Alexandre Dumas (translated from the French)
“_ _’ _   _ _ _ _ _  interesting…” is a part of quotations spoken by Lenny Kravitz and L. Ron Hubbard.
“_ _’ _   _ _ _ _ _  alright…” is a part of a quotation spoken by Marilyn Monroe in a movie.

What is the soft gray sulfide material? What are the words that fill in the eight blanks?

Dessert Menu

“Alternativerity” Dessert
In wine there are lees but no lies

Name a beverage brand name, in eight different letters.
Three of its letters can be rearranged to form a synonym of “falsehood.”
Four of its letters can be rearranged to form a second synonym of “falsehood.” Three of its letters, using one of them twice, can be rearranged to form a four-letter adjective that often modifies this four-letter synonym, intensifying its sense of prevarication.
Two consecutive letters of the brand name form a word that precedes a word made with four of the brand’s rearranged letters to form the first two words of a Latin phrase, the second Latin word of which is also a kind of beverage.
The third word of the Latin phrase can be formed by rearranging five of the brand’s letters (after tossing an R and an S into the mix). This seven-letter third word is an antonym of “falsehood.”

What is the beverage brand? What are the two synonyms of “falsehood,” and the adjective that modifies the four-letter synonym?
What is the Latin phrase?


Every Friday at Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! we publish a new menu of fresh word puzzles, number puzzles, logic puzzles, puzzles of all varieties and flavors. We cater to cravers of scrumptious puzzles!

Our master chef, Grecian gourmet puzzle-creator Lego Lambda, blends and bakes up mysterious (and sometimes questionable) toppings and spices (such as alphabet soup, Mobius bacon strips, diced snake eyes, cubed radishes, “hominym” grits, anagraham crackers, rhyme thyme and sage sprinklings.)

Please post your comments below. Feel free also to post clever and subtle hints that do not give the puzzle answers away. Please wait until after 3 p.m. Eastern Time on Wednesdays to post your answers and explain your hints about the puzzles. We serve up at least one fresh puzzle every Friday.

We invite you to make it a habit to “Meet at Joe’s!” If you enjoy our weekly puzzle party, please tell your friends about Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! Thank you.

Friday, March 3, 2017

Smoky Incense and mirrors; Abecedarian nation! Invasion of the molar men! A three state solution; Tropic Of Barleycorn;

P! SLICES: OVER (65 + 432) SERVED

Welcome to our March the 3rd edition Joseph Young’s Puzzleria!

It is not Tuesday, March the 3rd, of course. That happens roughly every seven years, and especially when Tuesday Weld is married to Fredric March’s eponymous grandson.

No, this is Friday, March the 3rd. This also happens roughly every seven years, but especially when Robinson Crusoe’s man, Friday, is married to Fredric March’s eponymous grandson. So...
 
March into our menus like a labyrinth-loving lion.
Enjoy, please.
LegoLambda… Marching out. 

Hors d’Oeuvre Menu

E Tria De Multis Hors d’Oeuvre:
A three state solution

Consider Arizona and Rhode Island. Only one of the remaining 48 United States shares something in common with those two. 

What state is it?

Note: The “something in common” has nothing at all to do with state capitals. (Were that the case, the answer would be South Dakota.) 
However, knowing your U.S. state postal abbreviations should help you to solve this puzzle.

Morsel Menu

Fast As Molarasses In March Morsel:
Invasion of the molar men!

Name two words – a verb and a modifier, in that order – describing what a private collector and a Canadian dentist had to do to take ownership, respectively (if not respectfully), of a presidential assassin’s coffin and a deceased Beatle’s molar.

Put the modifier before the verb and pronounce this result aloud, forming an adjective some people might well use to describe the nature of these two transactions.

What are the verb and modifier, and what is the adjective?

Appetizer Menu

Donnin’ Your Drinkin’ Duds Appetizer:
Tropic Of Barleycorn

Name a place where tropical drinks are served, in two words. Follow this, without a space, with the first three letters of an article of clothing (in two words containing 13 letters), sometimes worn by patrons of this place. 

The result spells the first and last names of a retired professional athlete who still appears on TV.

Hint: The remaining, unused final letters in the article of clothing form a pool of ten letters. From this 10-letter pool you can form any of the following terms:
1. A word that often follows the athlete’s first name (3 letters)
2. Something a patron of the place serving tropical drinks might order (3 letters)
3. A small serving of that something (4 letters)
4. Slang for something foamy a patron might order (4 letters)
5. Something “softer” a patron might order (4 letters)
6. A yellowish/brownish condiment a patron might ask for (7 letters)
7. (If you add a “p” to the 10-letter pool)… A somewhat legalistic, two-word name for the establishment (4 letters, 4 letters)

Who is this athlete?
What are the place that serves tropical drinks and the article of clothing worn sometimes by it patrons?
What are the seven terms formed from the 10-letter pool?

MENU 
 
Ripping Off Shortz And Maravetz Slices:
Abecedarian nation!

Will Shortz’s February 26th NPR Weekend Edition Sunday puzzle, composed by Mark Maravetz, reads:
Take five consecutive letters of the alphabet. Write them in left-to-right order. Insert five letters at certain spots. These will all go between the first and last given letters. The result will be a famous actor – first and last names. Who is it?

Note: For Puzzleria’s Riffing/Ripping Off Shortz And Maravetz Slices please use Puzzleria’s Closed-Loop Circular Seamless Alphabet (pictured below), if needed. Our puzzle slices read:
ONE:
Take seven consecutive letters of the alphabet. Write them in left-to-right order. Insert eleven letters at certain spots, five of which will go between the first and last of the seven consecutive alphabet letters. The result will be two actors – first and last names (5 letters in each first name and 4 letters in each last name). Who are these actors?

TWO:
Take four consecutive letters of the alphabet. Write them in left-to-right order. Insert seven letters at certain spots, five of which will go between the first and last of the four consecutive alphabet letters. The result will be a famous poet – first and last names (5 letters in the first name and 6 letters in the last name). Who is this poet?

THREE:
Take five consecutive letters of the alphabet. Write them in left-to-right order. Insert five letters at certain spots, four of which will go between the first and last of the five consecutive alphabet letters. The result will be a not-very-famous golf professional – first and last names (each with 5 letters). Who is this golf pro?
Hint: At age 16 this all-league high school golfer lost a match by one stroke to a 5-year-old prodigy who three years earlier had showed off his precocity on the Mike Douglas TV talk show.

FOUR:
Take eight consecutive letters of the alphabet. Write them in left-to-right order. Insert three letters at certain spots. These will all go between the first and last given letters. The result will be two words:

1. What a desirable element releasing heat might do to an aircraft, and
2. What an undesirable element concealing heat might do to an aircraft.

What are these two words?

Dessert Menu

Lowercase Letters Lead To Higher Power Dessert:

Name a substance considered by many to be a panacea, in two words. Type it in lowercase.
Remove the second word. Spell the first word backward and replace the fourth letter of the result with the letter that is its mirror image. Add to the right of this replacement letter a letter that almost always follows in on the printed page. 

The resulting word is a place of public worship.

What is this substance? What is the place of worship?
  
Every Friday at Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! we publish a new menu of fresh word puzzles, number puzzles, logic puzzles, puzzles of all varieties and flavors. We cater to cravers of scrumptious puzzles!

Our master chef, Grecian gourmet puzzle-creator Lego Lambda, blends and bakes up mysterious (and sometimes questionable) toppings and spices (such as alphabet soup, Mobius bacon strips, diced snake eyes, cubed radishes, “hominym” grits, anagraham crackers, rhyme thyme and sage sprinklings.)

Please post your comments below. Feel free also to post clever and subtle hints that do not give the puzzle answers away. Please wait until after 3 p.m. Eastern Time on Wednesdays to post your answers and explain your hints about the puzzles. We serve up at least one fresh puzzle every Friday.
 
We invite you to make it a habit to “Meet at Joe’s!” If you enjoy our weekly puzzle party, please tell your friends about Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! Thank you.

Our master chef, Grecian gourmet puzzle-creator Lego Lambda, blends and bakes up mysterious (and sometimes questionable) toppings and spices (such as alphabet soup, Mobius bacon strips, diced snake eyes, cubed radishes, “hominym” grits, anagraham crackers, rhyme thyme and sage sprinklings.)

Please post your comments below. Feel free also to post clever and subtle hints that do not give the puzzle answers away. Please wait until after 3 p.m. Eastern Time on Wednesdays to post your answers and explain your hints about the puzzles. We serve up at least one fresh puzzle every Friday.


We invite you to make it a habit to “Meet at Joe’s!” If you enjoy our weekly puzzle party, please tell your friends about Joseph Young’s Puzzleria! Thank you.